Showing posts with label thoughts. Show all posts
Showing posts with label thoughts. Show all posts
Friday, September 24, 2010
Wednesday, October 15, 2008
Unconcious Rantings
Because I am so bored at work and because I have not slept in weeks, I have had WAY too much time to think - about everything. They say that women get "hormonal" when they are pregnant. I am not convinced it's not hormones. It's actually because we are TIRED and the hours of lying awake at night leaves us with lots of time to re-live "real" happenings or create imaginary scenarios in our head. You know the kind - when you actually wake up frustrated, anxious or mad at someone - not because they have done anything, but because you created a scene in your head all night?
Poor Peter wakes up to find that I already have a list of things that need to get done today, this week, this season and this lifetime. I am also convinced that if these things don't get done the big blue sky will actually fall. By the time he rolls out of bed I have solved half of the world's problems and don't understand why he doesn't read my mind and catch up! The nerve.
I do recognize the inconvenience of planning someone else's life while they are sleeping. It might actually be a definition of craziness. Thank God we have girlfriends for this sort of thing. I can call and scream into a phone and then by the end of the conversation I realize I need to SLOW DOWN and remember that my plans for solving the economic crisis, our unborn child's middle school choices, Thanksgiving 2010, and our birthing plan should be discussed with a fully conscious husband BEFORE I accuse him (in my head) of not understanding me.
Thank goodness for grace, forgiveness and a sense of humor (for yourself and others).
I am off to nap on the floor of the Shop now. We have had ZERO customers and after trying to light the wood burning stove and smoking the place out, I think the carbon monoxide will be a nice sleep inducer.
Poor Peter wakes up to find that I already have a list of things that need to get done today, this week, this season and this lifetime. I am also convinced that if these things don't get done the big blue sky will actually fall. By the time he rolls out of bed I have solved half of the world's problems and don't understand why he doesn't read my mind and catch up! The nerve.
I do recognize the inconvenience of planning someone else's life while they are sleeping. It might actually be a definition of craziness. Thank God we have girlfriends for this sort of thing. I can call and scream into a phone and then by the end of the conversation I realize I need to SLOW DOWN and remember that my plans for solving the economic crisis, our unborn child's middle school choices, Thanksgiving 2010, and our birthing plan should be discussed with a fully conscious husband BEFORE I accuse him (in my head) of not understanding me.
Thank goodness for grace, forgiveness and a sense of humor (for yourself and others).
I am off to nap on the floor of the Shop now. We have had ZERO customers and after trying to light the wood burning stove and smoking the place out, I think the carbon monoxide will be a nice sleep inducer.
Sunday, May 25, 2008
In my dream world . . .
Sex and the City would still be on TV and the movie would have come out YESTERDAY! Alright already, I have been patient and waited like a good little girl, but it's time . . . Miranda, Carrie, Charlotte and Samantha . . . I miss you. What have you been up to?
I cannot wait to see the movie! 5 days and COUNTING! What should I wear?
I would forever get to eat macaroni and cheese and not gain a single pound. Yum...
Our US Weekly Magazine would come twice a week instead of only once. We actually fight over who gets to read it first when we get home. Once PH digs into it, I don't see him for an hour.
Micca would live next door and we would have some sort of home business that we did together. It would be something really fun and challenging at the same time - but completely flexible of course. We would have babies at the same time and hang out every single day- taking the kids for walks, vacations, playgrounds. Of course, we would work on our excellent business during the kids' nap times.
I would have a dishwasher . . . Enough said. I am convinced that the dishwasher is the missing link to any complete and utterly blissful life.
The movie Knocked Up had never been made . . . It is really THAT BAD of a movie. The more I think of it, the less I like it. Actually, the more I think of it the more repulsed I am by the whole idea of the movie. Laughing that a nice and put together girl gets wasted and pregnant by a loser pot head. They don't even begin to be a believable couple - even in Hollywood fantasy world. Ugh. I also resent the fact that the movie scared Peter to death and is convinced that all women who get pregnant / or married turn into witches and trolls.
In my dream world, I would be married to this man . . .
Oh wait, I AM!!!! Have you met Peter Howell? He's the best. Truly. The greatest man on earth.
I cannot wait to see the movie! 5 days and COUNTING! What should I wear?
I would forever get to eat macaroni and cheese and not gain a single pound. Yum...
Our US Weekly Magazine would come twice a week instead of only once. We actually fight over who gets to read it first when we get home. Once PH digs into it, I don't see him for an hour.
Micca would live next door and we would have some sort of home business that we did together. It would be something really fun and challenging at the same time - but completely flexible of course. We would have babies at the same time and hang out every single day- taking the kids for walks, vacations, playgrounds. Of course, we would work on our excellent business during the kids' nap times.
I would have a dishwasher . . . Enough said. I am convinced that the dishwasher is the missing link to any complete and utterly blissful life.
The movie Knocked Up had never been made . . . It is really THAT BAD of a movie. The more I think of it, the less I like it. Actually, the more I think of it the more repulsed I am by the whole idea of the movie. Laughing that a nice and put together girl gets wasted and pregnant by a loser pot head. They don't even begin to be a believable couple - even in Hollywood fantasy world. Ugh. I also resent the fact that the movie scared Peter to death and is convinced that all women who get pregnant / or married turn into witches and trolls.
In my dream world, I would be married to this man . . .
Oh wait, I AM!!!! Have you met Peter Howell? He's the best. Truly. The greatest man on earth.
Saturday, May 24, 2008
What have you been doing?
Well, the answer to the question... This Memorial Day weekend it is rainy, cloudy and cold in Livingston. Here is what we have been up to . . .
Thursday night I hosted the 49'er Winer at our house. Levia, Page, Darcy, Megan, and Shana came over. We had a GREAT night! As usual the noise in the house reached unimaginable octaves. My stomach hurt from laughing so hard. Girls have a lot of fun left with a few bottles of wine, some quarters, and playful imaginations.
Let's just say - I won by 5 quarters and a bottle cap! However, I now have a busted toe and am walking around limping like Igor from Frankenstein. The entire nail on my big toe is black and the actual toe itself looks like a small tomato (I'll spare you the photos). It's putting a slight kink in my running training schedule to say the least!
Peter drove to Ennis this week and picked up to of Storr's and Bev's fjord horses (Emma and Diara(?))to take back to the ranch he works at here in town. They haven't been able to ride them and get them where they need to be, so it's the Horse Whisperer Pete's turn. He will be trying to break them in a bit more and get them ridable. Pete says they are loving their new home and they are warming to him nicely . . . He will have them eating apples out of his hand and riding them bareback in no time! We will likely buy at least one of them for the outfitting business. One down, 11 more to go.
Peter and I saw the new Indiana Jones movie last night. There was a very creepy part with red ants that gave me nightmares. Harrison Ford is still a hottie.
Peter is with Matt Blank fishing on the Missouri River again for the weekend. I guess he just can't get enough of that scenery and those trout! If it rains too much he might come home early . . . Is it bad to wish for a monsoon?
I am almost done with a great book by one of my favorite authors, Jennifer Weiner. It's called Certain Girls and it takes me back to that torcherous time of life as a pre-teen. The book has given me some insight as to what a SAINT my mother must be to have lived through life with a teenage daughter - yikes.
Peter is reading Endurance - the story of Shackelton and his eventful journey to Antarctica.
The rain has made our lawn and gardens look very green and lush, but our lawnmower is broken so the yard is now a jungle for the dogs . . . I think they like it. Pretty sure they were playing cowboys and Indians this morning.
We have decided to xeriscape much of the yard... Trying to keep a yard green in the middle of a semi-arid landscape in the middle of a historical drought has proven to be expensive, disrespectful to our water resources, and a whole lot of work! Not to mention the MUD that is created most of the year from the areas of the yard that the grass just won't take is driving me CRAZY (just ask Peter).
So, we are going to create some neat rock / gravel designs with some occasional native plants and shrubbery that don't need to be watered. We will leave a large area in the backyard for the dogs to play, of course. That new big Dodge duelly pick up will soon be making a few runs to the gravel yard... Pictures to come soon!
My veggie garden is looking GOOD. It has loved the rain and I already need to thin much of it out. I have a mystery sprouting of something that made it through the winter. I think it is calendula... It is everywhere!
The Waters girls- Marni and Loni (Pete's cousins)- along with their mom Jan (Joellyn's sister) are coming over tonight. Looks like it will be another girls night at the Howell house!
The dogs are with me at the Shop today - being as charming as ever. Greeting customers, protecting me as I work all alone. It has been very quiet around here, as the Yellowstone River reached an almost record high (for the last 10 years) in terms of river flow and height this week. It makes the fishing a little tough when the water looks like chocolate milk and there are large trees being carried down the river.
It is an actual "event" around here to go down to the River morning, noon and night to see how high it is, how muddy it is, basically just to look at it. This week, we would ride the Cruisers down to the River and see 1/2 of town - everyone oohing and ahhing and reminiscing about the last time they saw the banks of the Yellowstone underwater. Ah, life in a small river town.
So folks . . . That has been life for us lately. Two young late twenties / early thirties kids and 3 dogs - living a too-good-to-be true life!
Thursday night I hosted the 49'er Winer at our house. Levia, Page, Darcy, Megan, and Shana came over. We had a GREAT night! As usual the noise in the house reached unimaginable octaves. My stomach hurt from laughing so hard. Girls have a lot of fun left with a few bottles of wine, some quarters, and playful imaginations.
Let's just say - I won by 5 quarters and a bottle cap! However, I now have a busted toe and am walking around limping like Igor from Frankenstein. The entire nail on my big toe is black and the actual toe itself looks like a small tomato (I'll spare you the photos). It's putting a slight kink in my running training schedule to say the least!
Peter drove to Ennis this week and picked up to of Storr's and Bev's fjord horses (Emma and Diara(?))to take back to the ranch he works at here in town. They haven't been able to ride them and get them where they need to be, so it's the Horse Whisperer Pete's turn. He will be trying to break them in a bit more and get them ridable. Pete says they are loving their new home and they are warming to him nicely . . . He will have them eating apples out of his hand and riding them bareback in no time! We will likely buy at least one of them for the outfitting business. One down, 11 more to go.
Peter and I saw the new Indiana Jones movie last night. There was a very creepy part with red ants that gave me nightmares. Harrison Ford is still a hottie.
Peter is with Matt Blank fishing on the Missouri River again for the weekend. I guess he just can't get enough of that scenery and those trout! If it rains too much he might come home early . . . Is it bad to wish for a monsoon?
I am almost done with a great book by one of my favorite authors, Jennifer Weiner. It's called Certain Girls and it takes me back to that torcherous time of life as a pre-teen. The book has given me some insight as to what a SAINT my mother must be to have lived through life with a teenage daughter - yikes.
Peter is reading Endurance - the story of Shackelton and his eventful journey to Antarctica.
The rain has made our lawn and gardens look very green and lush, but our lawnmower is broken so the yard is now a jungle for the dogs . . . I think they like it. Pretty sure they were playing cowboys and Indians this morning.
We have decided to xeriscape much of the yard... Trying to keep a yard green in the middle of a semi-arid landscape in the middle of a historical drought has proven to be expensive, disrespectful to our water resources, and a whole lot of work! Not to mention the MUD that is created most of the year from the areas of the yard that the grass just won't take is driving me CRAZY (just ask Peter).
So, we are going to create some neat rock / gravel designs with some occasional native plants and shrubbery that don't need to be watered. We will leave a large area in the backyard for the dogs to play, of course. That new big Dodge duelly pick up will soon be making a few runs to the gravel yard... Pictures to come soon!
My veggie garden is looking GOOD. It has loved the rain and I already need to thin much of it out. I have a mystery sprouting of something that made it through the winter. I think it is calendula... It is everywhere!
The Waters girls- Marni and Loni (Pete's cousins)- along with their mom Jan (Joellyn's sister) are coming over tonight. Looks like it will be another girls night at the Howell house!
The dogs are with me at the Shop today - being as charming as ever. Greeting customers, protecting me as I work all alone. It has been very quiet around here, as the Yellowstone River reached an almost record high (for the last 10 years) in terms of river flow and height this week. It makes the fishing a little tough when the water looks like chocolate milk and there are large trees being carried down the river.
It is an actual "event" around here to go down to the River morning, noon and night to see how high it is, how muddy it is, basically just to look at it. This week, we would ride the Cruisers down to the River and see 1/2 of town - everyone oohing and ahhing and reminiscing about the last time they saw the banks of the Yellowstone underwater. Ah, life in a small river town.
So folks . . . That has been life for us lately. Two young late twenties / early thirties kids and 3 dogs - living a too-good-to-be true life!
Friday, April 25, 2008
For Every Season
I just finished stoking the wood stove in the Shop. It's cold here today. Might need a few more logs. The snow if falling really hard and fast as I look out the window and the Absaroka's were under storm clouds this morning as I drove to work. The ground is still blanketed in white and the scavenging deer I see each day on the roadside and in the farmer's fields are beginning to look desperate. I can't help but think that they too are ready to see some green grass and sunshine. It's April 25th - 4 days until my "Spring" Birthday. Last year the snow was long gone, the grass was green and starting to really grow. I remember not having my gardens planted last year at this time either, not because of the snow covering them but because I was too busy to get them in early. This year I was ready and now I wait patiently for one single day where the snow is melted and the dirt is thawed enough to till.
They say that this winter and spring are actually "normal" for Montana. I have heard the stories of winter lasting from October to May, with mutiple feet of snow blanketing even the valley towns for the entire season. Digging your cars out, being snowed into homes. While this winter was not that extreme, it was above the 10-year average. I am thankful that our parched grounds and thirsty forests and rivers will see more moisture this summer. As all of this snow melts in the peaks I am grateful for the gifts it will bring. It will trickle down to our ranch and farmlands, feed the rivers, wetlands - keeping it full and cooler for all our trout and wildlife. I am hopeful that the additional water will keep us from another devastating wild fire season. Don't get me wrong -I love fire and I love the way that forest fires cleans the forest, bring new life and respect that they are needed and part of a beautiful circle of life in the Northern Rockies. However, our lands have not been maintained as they should, there is too much underbrush, dead fall, and when these fires come, mixed with the drought we have seen for 10 years - they eat up the land, burning hotter than they should, filling the Valleys with smoke that is indescribable. I am not fond of hot summers with smoke.
It seems every season, every element of the seasons is teaching me something here. I see the the miracle that is the snow and water, the sun and the heat. This ecosystem is so delicate. We think of it often as so massive and "strong" - the hugeness of the mountains and the skies deceives us. It is much more delicate than it appears. The winters feed the spring, the springs feed the summers, the summers determine how the winters will look. I have learned to love and loathe each season all at the same time. In the middle of the ski season I am LOVING the massive amounts of snow and powder found in the mountains. Bouncing and floating and playing in those hills are some of my favorite memories I have. Come Spring, I am sick of my layers, wool socks, white belly. I am ready for a day in the yard, walking in shorts and sandals, hiking in the hills and not needing all the cumbersome winter equipment to see the back country. But the second I start to growl, moan or complain I see the bigger picture. Some little creature, some insect, some fauna is grateful - oh so grateful that it is fed, that it will not be starving in the heat of the drought summer.
The fishermen are wishing they were on the rivers sans their overcoats, the spring bug hatches are a bit behind because of the cold weather and water temperatures . . . But we all know how good this long winter, this added blessing of snow is. Our run off season will be longer, allowing our waters stay full, the grounds will be more nourished, our fish will be happy, our water-loving friends will be happy that the rivers are full and waves are big, fish are rising. It's all part of the process. Who am I to judge or grumble at such a magnificent life force. I am grateful to be part of it.
I then see my little friends - the deer - pawing at the frozen earth, looking for that fresh green growth that seems to not be coming. For their sake and for the sake of my tan . . . I love you Winter, but isn't it time to let Spring have it's turn?
They say that this winter and spring are actually "normal" for Montana. I have heard the stories of winter lasting from October to May, with mutiple feet of snow blanketing even the valley towns for the entire season. Digging your cars out, being snowed into homes. While this winter was not that extreme, it was above the 10-year average. I am thankful that our parched grounds and thirsty forests and rivers will see more moisture this summer. As all of this snow melts in the peaks I am grateful for the gifts it will bring. It will trickle down to our ranch and farmlands, feed the rivers, wetlands - keeping it full and cooler for all our trout and wildlife. I am hopeful that the additional water will keep us from another devastating wild fire season. Don't get me wrong -I love fire and I love the way that forest fires cleans the forest, bring new life and respect that they are needed and part of a beautiful circle of life in the Northern Rockies. However, our lands have not been maintained as they should, there is too much underbrush, dead fall, and when these fires come, mixed with the drought we have seen for 10 years - they eat up the land, burning hotter than they should, filling the Valleys with smoke that is indescribable. I am not fond of hot summers with smoke.
It seems every season, every element of the seasons is teaching me something here. I see the the miracle that is the snow and water, the sun and the heat. This ecosystem is so delicate. We think of it often as so massive and "strong" - the hugeness of the mountains and the skies deceives us. It is much more delicate than it appears. The winters feed the spring, the springs feed the summers, the summers determine how the winters will look. I have learned to love and loathe each season all at the same time. In the middle of the ski season I am LOVING the massive amounts of snow and powder found in the mountains. Bouncing and floating and playing in those hills are some of my favorite memories I have. Come Spring, I am sick of my layers, wool socks, white belly. I am ready for a day in the yard, walking in shorts and sandals, hiking in the hills and not needing all the cumbersome winter equipment to see the back country. But the second I start to growl, moan or complain I see the bigger picture. Some little creature, some insect, some fauna is grateful - oh so grateful that it is fed, that it will not be starving in the heat of the drought summer.
The fishermen are wishing they were on the rivers sans their overcoats, the spring bug hatches are a bit behind because of the cold weather and water temperatures . . . But we all know how good this long winter, this added blessing of snow is. Our run off season will be longer, allowing our waters stay full, the grounds will be more nourished, our fish will be happy, our water-loving friends will be happy that the rivers are full and waves are big, fish are rising. It's all part of the process. Who am I to judge or grumble at such a magnificent life force. I am grateful to be part of it.
I then see my little friends - the deer - pawing at the frozen earth, looking for that fresh green growth that seems to not be coming. For their sake and for the sake of my tan . . . I love you Winter, but isn't it time to let Spring have it's turn?
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